Ever felt inadequate to take on the world?
I do. And to some extent, I blame my age group for that.
The twenty’s are the time when you need to get your ducks in a line, so to speak, Get a good job, build a career and so on and so forth. And while I don’t disagree with that premise, I find it inherently flawed to a large extent.
See, the result at the end of the road is always portrayed as something incredible but I feel inadequate to deal with the journey. That’s not to say I am not trying but what is the end if I don’t know what the end has to be. In this day and age of so many choices and decisions, how do you come to a single idea and are positive to stick to it no matter what?
For example, I need to choose between a career, that albeit boring, will pay me well and guarantee a good life and a career that is risky with some struggle but something I know I’ll be good at. I know that there are a lot of others who can relate to this as well. I miss when I was a 16 year old with not a care in the world, not caring about implications and norms. I never retained that especially as a twenty something with responsibility. The feeling of I can do anything I want is something to cherish and I wish I could go back to those moments.
This journey is hard, frustrating and a lot of time, disappointing. I had plans of what it would be like to be a twenty something year old and its not what I had hoped for. Working 45 hours a week, too exhausted at the end of the day and the weekend is just two days to catch up on sleep and feel lazy. I know I am lazy and I don’t deny that but how does everyone else go through this?
Through all of this cribbing, if their was one thing that I knew with absolute certainty is that it’s a phase. Not because someone told me but just because it has to be. Life throws way too many curve balls and this is the one where life decided to get a little more daring. But this journey is also eye opening because through all of this self doubt and introspection, you discover parts of yourself you never knew existed, you realise strengths and weaknesses that you never knew were there either. Maybe at the end of this conflict lies something incredible, a new journey hopefully.
Thank you for reading through this rant 🙂